News that Councillor Martin Mullaney ™ has been stripped of his role as a Councillor is apparently causing growing concern amongst his admittedly small band of supporters.

Councillor Martin Mullaney ™ bravely exposed a local property developer as being a supporter of the Labour Party in a manner that the highest court in the land said was “completely out of order”. Although this selfless action alerted Moseley residents of some apparently legal building work it has come at a terrifying personal cost.

Councillor Martin Mullaney ™ has invested his entire soul in being a Councillor and the removal of his “function” has apparently meant that he is beginning to fade out our reality. A close friend of Councillor Martin Mullaney ™ told us,

“He really really likes being a Councillor, you’ve noticed he’s actually incorporated the word Councillor into his name haven’t you? You know in those videos? When he introduces himself he always says “My name is Councillor Martin Mullaney ™”. I don’t think he was christened that. Though if he was it certainly shows some foresight from his parents. Especially as he seemingly had no interest in politics until recently.

You should have seen him the day he was elected. He went straight out and dyed his hair grey. He said it made him look more statesman like. He was like a very old child.

I’m worried now though. You can literally see straight through him. It’s like now he has no purpose there is no need for him to exist in our world.”

Ironically Councillor Martin Mullaney ™ has claimed that some of his more outlandish antics have all been carried out not in his role as a Councillor but as a private citizen. Though this clearly demonstrates an interpretation of the law not shared by lawyers, the courts and, well anyone else it has actually become a reality.

In order to beckon Councillor Martin Mullaney ™ back to our reality people are requested to gather on the Village Green at around 3:00pm on Saturday to chant his name in some sort of creepy ritual. Though you’re probably busy, shopping or painting a fence so don’t worry about it too much.