The peaceful dreams of a Moseley man have been cruelly shattered by a bizarre recurring bunny theme. The local resident, who wished to remain anonymous, on the grounds that he still has a modicum of self-respect, claimed he was a shattered wreck. “Every time I close my eyes I see giant rabbits, they have money you know.” This manifestation occurs most nights and appears to be becoming increasingly more menacing. “It started when Happi Pets closed down. They didn’t have a closing down sale, I think they just released all the rabbits into the community.”
A local expert on dreams claimed there is nothing sinister in enormous rabbits but advised that the young man to “lay off the beer and confront his fears in a pet shop.” This sinister turn of events seems to be indicative of the lack of quality of news in Moseley this month.