With crime rocketing out of control in Moseley it appears that a drastic solution is called for. Some may consider public hanging is a little too drastic but it is undeniable that the rotting corpse of a young criminal suspended thirty feet above Moseley High Street is likely to have a strong deterrant effect.
This extreme solution has been prompted by calls for justice from local animal rights campaigners, the police and local Muslims. Recently all concerned were outraged when feckless youths painted “Fuck the pigs” across the front of Woodbridge Road police station.
A representative of a local animal rights group told us “It’s disgusting, the thought of violating a defenceless animal turns my stomach. We should take these bastards and talk to them in the only language they understand.”
The erection of a gallows on Moseley High Street has now been completed and we can expect the first public hanging to coincide with the next farmers market. It should be a cracking day out for all the family.